Two days ago I made a grave mistake and that is to have had my baby trust me even lesser than before. It was not meant to be and I didn't want to hurt my baby.
We were having quarrels so constantly that at one point of time, I felt terribly lost and did not know what to do about it. There was even a point of time when I thought if the quarrels would continue, its going to create disaster to the relationship.
I felt like giving up. But I realized its more than that. I started thinking about the good things we had and the bad times we had went through together.
My baby was there when I was terribly sick and I thought I was going to die or something. My baby stayed put by my side and ensured I ate medicines and recovered.
And when I finished work late, my baby will be waiting for me. I used to knock off way earlier and waited for my baby instead but recently with my new job, that doesnt allow me to do so. I wish to but I cant.
But I will and have tried to make a point to wait for my baby to finish work and send my baby home.
I remembered the times we told ourselves that we needed to save money to travel overseas to Japan, Taiwan and Thailand etc together.
I made a mistake by trying to know another person. I would have stopped at the last sentence but I want everyone to know that it was my fault and I admit to that mistake. I am not afraid of losing my face anymore.
It is a matter of owning to the mistakes that I committed.
I have learnt to take responsiblities.
Today, a few minutes ago, I surfed a few blogs, couple blogs like peggy chang's, andy's, and looking around me, seeing my supervisor still going strong with his girlfriend for years. I saw how lovey dovey they were.
I made a mistake by not fully loving my honey.
I want to give that love. I want to love my honey whole heartedly. And I will now.
