The Story Of Long Fingernails

There's always a story behind everything. And here's the story of Kent's long fingernails.

He likes to keep his fingernails long for a few reasons. So that he can dig his nose better, get all the shits out.

He likes to keep it long so that he can do manicure on his nails and put all the different colors.

But all these are just primary reasons.

He keeps his fingernails long for sex session. He likes foreplay; scratching the guy's back and then pur like the cat and if his partner disobey him, he'll just shove his fingers in his partner's ass.

So that's how the story goes.

What If....

We played pretence for a day. We pretended that there was a reporter following us wherever we went to and he was none other than Harziyan!

We felt a little uncomfortable. It's like we were being followed.

Nana reluctantly had her photo taken.

Ah, I was being photographed too.

I was like, "What the hell you want from me?" I rolled my eyes.

"I just want to take good photos of you, can?" reporter Yan said.

I rolled my eyes again.

"Let's move to the that background. You go stand there and I take good shots of you ok?"

1

2

3

"Ops! You've been blocked!" Yan said shyly.

Again...

"Yeah, perfect. Tyra would love it."

And then we chanced upon one of our company mates.

"Come reporter, take photo of my girlfriend and I!"

Perfect!

"Hey Issac, I heard that you masturbate 5 times a day. Is that true?" Haidir asked.

Reporter Yan, "My god! Is it true?"

"Not true!" I defended myself.

"Don't lie to us!" Haidir became more excited.

Immediately, I ran away from him, pulling reporter Yan and Nana along with me.

"Wah, at escalator also want to take photos of me ah?"

Reporter Yan, "Smile naturally..."

"Now how? Can or not?" I asked.

"SMILE WIDER YOU ARSEHOLE!" he shouted.

Is this it?!!!

Dumb Me

I thought what would be a better way to be a dumber me.

Try poking chopsticks into your nostrils.

An Old Uncle

Author's note; This entry is very singlish. Read it at your own risk.

Why not be an old guy for once? I acted like one barbaric 'ah pek' at botanic garden. It was fun. It was ridiculous!

"Eh! Simi?! What you looking at?" I shouted to the little girl.

Oi! Why bully my daughter? Never kanna slap before issit?

"Never ah... Come ah, hit me lah! If you dare hit a 60 year old uncle!"

Then I got up from my seat and pretended to run like one uncle, slowly and swaying around. "I tell you ah! You'll get retribution for bullying an old uncle like me!

Evil twin, "You look more like an Ah Beng rather than a ah pek..."

The Absolute 'Drunken' Boy

Being drunk is good because you tend to forget your sorrows. It's like you are flying like a sparrow so freely in the sky. So you know what? Let's pretend to be drunk.

Must take off shoes first. But do drunkens take off their own shoes or do they need people to take off for them?

How about pants? Do we, drunkens have to take them off ourselves?

So totally freaking naked!

I love being 'drunk'. It's like having multiple orgasm.