I've been thinking, how on earth, do my beloved Queens. Kylie, Madonna, Mariah and Jennifer get such gorgeous, flawless, porcelain smooth, 'makes you wanna eat' skin?! I did my research, as usual, and the findings are astounding. It's no surprise that virtually every celebrity you see on the red carpet has gone - somewhat here and there - under the knife. OR at least the needle, or laser light, or whatever shit stuff you can think about that enhances your beauty, your youth and your sex appeal. If there is one commonality that everyone of them shares, it is that they look soooo good - well at least most of them do. I wonder who's plastic surgery actually failed, like big time *AHEM* Donatella Versace.
Here are some examples of what the beauty queens do. Starting of with the Queen of the World. Madonna. Reports say she spend a million on her physical maintenance a year - which includes $600/hr yoga sessions for her arms, high end creams and serums, fillers for her lost tissue in her hands (Gawd, have you seen her veins), purported botox injections into her ass and of course...her custom made DIAMOND eyelashes from Shu Uemura. She apparently paid $2 million for those sparkles you usually have on jewellery, but her excuse was that they were a mere replacement of Ferraris and Lambos. Now that's like wearing my house on her eyes. Madge sometimes I don't know why I'm paying for your water bills - through your Sticky & Sweet Tour back in 08', Confessions on a Dancefloor, Hard Candy, I'm Gonna Tell You A Secret and who can forget The Immaculate Collection and GHV2?
And Kylie and Jennifer decide to join in the fun, with their high end laser facial treatments that zap away wrinkles, sunspots and delivers incredible beauty. I mean, just take a look at their skin. Kylie looks like she's not aged a bit! And Jen, well, I'd say let her beauty speak for itself - the result of consistent baths with Evian water, mixed with rose essence for her lustrous hair. I bet she uses things like honey as well, which by the way, she mixes with sugar and slathers over her entire body to bring out that irresistible glow that men (and women) can't resist.
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| Minogue |
And then we have Mariah. The Emancipated Butterfly who decided to get pregnant with a hot man. But how does MIMI sparkle, or in her case, glow on the red carpet? Simple. 24-Carat gold dust. If you think getting that healthy colour via rowing/tanning/swimming is good, wait till you see Mariah in person. Her skins shines like the sun itself. Oh such beauty, reminiscent of Queen Cleopatra.
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| Notice the even skin tones of her ENTIRE BODY? And not just her face? |
If you (ever) can afford it, try undergoing one of these tricks. They're kinda miraculous, in their effectual capacities. Ah. Can this vicious and endless pursuit of Beauty and Youth get any more absurd?!
