Love Unknown



Notes: I have to keep this. as I am unsure what is really going on. There's a little edit here and there but the main content is still there.

P/S: I still love you...



Isaac says:

when u going myammar ah?



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

14th of may



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

why leh?



Isaac says:

ok, just asking



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

is everything ok for u?



Isaac says:

yeah definitely..



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

can i tell u something?



Isaac says:

ya..



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

i miss u



Isaac says:

me too



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

really...



Isaac says:

yup..



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

i am not joking



Isaac says:

i am not joking too...i am very str8 forward nowadays. If I don't miss you, I will definitely say I am not missing you...



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

then



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

u got anything to tell me?



Isaac says:

juz take care for myanmmar ..



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

tats all?



Isaac says:

i cant say I LOVE YOU...



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

cos its not wat u feel?



Isaac says:

coz i dont wan to tear u apart from ur guy..



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

but how do u really feel?



Isaac says:

Mixed. Confused. My classmates, close friends asked me whether i still love my ex .. i replied, "yes.."



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

then can u tell me how u really feel?



Isaac says:

i love u..



Isaac says:

but there's a love barrier building up , meaning its hard for me to accept and love again.



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

u mean...?



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

i got a lot of things to say but at this point of time, i can't



Isaac says:

its better to keep this way..u are already attached with another guy...I don't want to ruin your relationship with him.



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

its not tat...



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

i juz have alot of things to tell u, to explain to u but i can't



Isaac says:

let me make it simple.. i have a few things to say too.



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

wat is tat?



Isaac says:

I love you and i still do...but i have to back away from u coz u are already attached with another guy...I dont wan to intervene... I tot of patching up with u but nothing's happen...

*XXX* loves me, but i dont feel the same way for *XXX* , maybe *XXX* love yes...i dont wish to say, or talk anything regarding relationships.



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

ok... sorry... sorry... :(



Isaac says:

there is a barrier between love and me...



Isaac says:

so if i am suppose to love someone again, u or *XXX* or anyone else, it will be very different...I cant really commit. I am too afraid to love or be love after what had happen.



Isaac says:

*XXX* has been asking..and i gave myself and *XXX* till 3rd june..if things work out between me and *XXX*, then we will be together. If it doesnt work out then we will both remain as friends. That's all I have to say.



Isaac says:

You need not say sorry earlier on...i dont see u doing anything wrong. This one month that i've waited.. it made me so upset..and gave me glimpse of hope but now i realise some things are not meant for u. My classmates, and my godbro had ask me to move on...

If u wan to explain or anything, say your final say..Even if u dont say, its ur lost..not mine... :)



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

i cannot tell u anything now, but one day, u will know why i leave u, why i went wif tat guy. i love u, and i have my reason but... i can't say. u will know. but promise me, when u know, don cry, don...



Isaac says:

i still dont understand u. If u have things to say, say now, if not dont say at all. Each time u stop halfway, i really hate it..



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

i cannot, when the time is right, u will know. i have no regrets in doing anything...



Isaac says:

whatever lah ok.



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

juz remember wat i say, i love you



Isaac says:

pls stop saying that..when u are not telling me anything.



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

i do...



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

i know i am not worth u loving anymore, but u still stay in my heart. live ur life well ok? i really miss and loved u, its still the same.



Isaac says:

can u stop that



Isaac says:

u're really upseting me...



Isaac says:

what is it u've got to say..



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

live ur life well. and keep me in ur heart, can?



Isaac says:

Is it such a pain to say? u've been like this since we were attach last time...got problem never tell. u treat me as wad? rubbish.. or cow dung?



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

at this point of time, all i wish is u lead a good life. sorry



Isaac says:

dont ever msn or tok to me..u really piss me off...



Isaac says:

if u really love me, tell me..pls...u're not torturing urself but u're torturing me tooo..What's going on? What's wrong with you actually?



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

now i juz wan to see u lead a good life, start afresh wif him cos i know he's more worthy than me. i will bear all the pain, let me bear it pls... dear, i am sorry. i love u. i tried to hold on but i can;t. take good care of urslf. dear...



Isaac says:

wait..tell me pls...if u love me tell me pls..



there'll be a day when we all will know the answer.... and we'll be happy but will there be this day? says:

i need to go now.. i am breaking down now and i can;t type... i feel very weak...

101 THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT ME...



Analysing...



Getting Personal...



1>>> I don't drink but that doesn't mean I can't - I still can if I want. I don't smoke and i will never ever even take a puf or two - I don't hate smokers because they are not harmful and they are still human just like me. I don't club, maybe I haven't get out more to explore; probably I will but that will only be in the future. I am still a virgin and will still be till I find my perfect partner. I am a vain person; I would always look myself into the mirror every 10 minutes or just take pictures of myself using my camera phone. I am a very patient guy; e.g. if my friends came late for more than an hour, I will still wait but don't push my limits. If you ever do, hell will break loose. But I don't scold vulgarity even though when I am furious. It's not a good way to potray/express yourself. I am da' jealous type of guy. I don't like my partner to flirt around. I am not flirtatious but if I ever finds out that my partner had betrayed me, I will then do so. I am faithful; I will be with my partner till to the end. I am very revengeful if my partner is such a jerk but usually I am not. And for a fact, I don't go around breaking people's heart.



Characters...



14>>> I am very helpful; I will eventually lend a helping hand to those people in need. e.g: If I sees a blind man crossing the road, I will help him get to the other side. But if they ever push my help away, well, they really don't need our sympathy. They don't deserve it. I am kind-hearted; I will also donate some amount of money to charity but not my blood - don't even ask me why. I always care my beloved ones, my friends and families; when they are in trouble, I would always be there for them but not always. I am very understanding - don't know how to elaborate further but trust me I am. I am not a very direct or straight forward person, I often beats around the bush but lately, I've become one that is open and not reserving my opinions in my thoughts and not letting it out anymore. I can discuss about everything and anything to my close friends, I am very open like I say. We can discuss topics ranging from school to outside world to sex. I am independent; I dont like people to help me unless I really needs them. I am friendly; I like to socialise with new people. I am humurous; I likes to tell jokes, and laugh my heads off. i am always jovial; unless some kind of a disaster befalls on me, if not I won't put on a long face. I like to spread the joy around, creating a more cheerful, stronger and better ambience for everyone. I am a very good listener; whenever my friends are troubled, I would always take some time to listen to their problemor even lend my shoulder to cry on.



More datas being anaylised...



Attributes...



28>>> I don't snore. I don't have bad breath. I don't have body odour, I don't spit, shout or even laugh aloud in public which will only tarnish my reputation so why should I? I don't dig my nose or ears in front of people. I don't scratch my armpits or my groin area when I'm in public - it's just plain disgusting. Sometimes I do burp in public but now not anymore. Please do it privately. I bath three times or even up to four times a day - morning, afternoon, evening and night. I often change my clothing if the ones I am wearing gets dirty.



Hates...



39>>> I hate liars. I hate posers and wannabes - Such craps. Stick to your own style and preference. I hate people who look down upon those lower class people. Becareful, you might be in poverty when you're old. Richness does not last. I hate good looking people who does not want to socialise with those uglier ones. Shame on you! You think you're that good looking! We will all grow old and our skins will wrinkled. All of us will aged and have white hairs. I hate those brainy, intelligence ones who thinks that they are smart and that they can do anything they want. I hate those people who thinks they are smart but they are just trying to act like one. Bleah! I hate those people who can buy anything they want to buy; they can splruge their money anytime they want. I hate turtle neck clothing - its so stuffy. I hate wasabi because I tasted it before and I cried my tears out! I hate my Primary 3 Form teacher, Miss Masnie - she's a bitch. I hate Darryl, my K2 friend, for bullying me everytime you saw me! I hate my secondary school classmates, Chi Hui, Wen Bin and Jian Jin for insulting people so often. Hope you will all get insulted back. I hate math; I got a grade F9 for it during my 'O' Levels. I hate Mr Chua, my physics teacher for being naggy and picking on weaker students on your subject. I hate my secondary school vice principal, Mr.Tan for being so strict, harsh and for setting new rules that we already knew. I hate backstabbers - such sore losers. I hate those people who tries to blend in with a group of people who doesnt wants him as a friend, but he's just pretending to be ignorant. I hate those people who holds a position but are slackers. I hate arrogant, snobbish kids - hate them to the core. I hate naggy people - just can't stand them. I hate two - timers. I hate those people that had broken the heart of their love ones.



Halt...Datas Interruption...10...9...Done.



Likings...



61>>> I like my Chemistry teacher, Miss Tan - she's nice, friendly and helpful and not forgeting... funny! She's just so hilarious. I like to eat at fast food restaurant. I like to eat Mutton Chop. I like to be attached and not single - I don't know why. LOL ...Maybe I am afraid to be lonely? I like Rose Bandung - it taste sweet and is one of my favorite drinks. I like to listen to classical/new age songs, preferably Enya's and Pachebel's. I like Sarah MchLachlan, Jewel Kilcher and Enya; I admire them. I like watching shows that have meaningful storyline/plot. I like writing novels - its my passion. I like beaches The most important thing of all is that I like myself.



Romance...



71>>> I like to cuddle with my beloved ones. I like to have passionate kiss with my partner. Having intimate moments with my partner, gazing at the stars, hugging each other under the skies. Spending our time at the beach, on a water-breaker, or lying on the sands, feeling the cool breeze brushing against our face, ruffling our hair. Taking a stroll at the beach, holding hands. Taking my partner to a restaurant and have a candlelight dinner. I like to surprise my partner with gifts or anything that attracts my partner. I like to be suprised too --- *hints*. I like to be at a quiet place, probably at park, so that we can have a nice long chat without anyone interrupting.



Some Data Links Missing...



Secrets...



80>>> Damn, I really like to gossip but to certain extend only. I was rebellious when I was a kid. I was a exhibitionist - I like to walk around naked at home when I was at the age of 16 and when nobody was at home - maybe back then I got the body, but now not anymore. I kissed before - passionate ones. I run away from home before because of some major misunderstanding between my parents and I. I have been in a relationship before. I like wearing sexy briefs. I would always love to buy tight boxers because I don't have one but I will buy one - soon I guess. I've 'steal' shoes from neighbours and drop them from the highest floor - 22nd floor to be exact. At the age of 14, I met more than 62 people from IRC, organised gatherings or met them 1 to 1.



Transmission Interrupted... Few secrets are not visible to the public's eyes.. 91>>>92>>>



Halt...Datas Interruption...8...7...6...5...4...3...Done.



Wishes...



93>>> My birthday falls on 3rd June... So you know what i will be expecting from you... I hope there will be world peace. I want powers, real powers - telekinesis or power to freeze time. I wish I have all the different kind of men's clothing. I want to owe a Mercedes Benz, a two storey house with swimming pool and a big garden. I want to be a superstar.



2...1...End... Let's go back to square one...

MONDAY BLUES? - NO WAY!



People often say 'Monday Blues'. Why? - Just because its a brand new week and its the first day of the week and they have to go to work and school and have to wait five more days before the weekends come again? And the working people will be grumbling away, 'Oh damn! I have to work today and face my boss yet again, have to hear his constant whining and scolding.' Bleah. And those kids will be going like, 'I'm going to have alot of homeworks again, tests, have to see the stern's teachers' faces.' - Duh! People...people...people...lossen it up... Think positive! Like duh! - Monday is not the only day you will see your stinking boss's face and your dreadful teacher. Stop your whining! It will do you no good. I REPEAT - IT WILL DO YOU NO GOOD! Monday is suppose to be a new day of the week, a day when you wake up, and starts afresh, do things right. Everyday will seems like a holiday to you if you lossen yourself up, stop your whining and think positive. If you feel stress out after a day work or study, take a breather, take 20 - 30 mins strolling at your park or have lunch or dinner with your friends, gossip around. Call your boyfriend/girlfriend, say mushy stuffs to one another, you will feel better. Listen to techno songs, move your body around if that makes you feel better and that if you like techno songs or preferably listen to classical songs - they are soothing to your ears...ENYA's songs will be great.



KTV YESTERDAY



Had alot of fun. Made erm 5 new friends from ITE Ang Mo Kio, student concillors, Yao Wei, Christine, Connie, Zhi Hui, Yvonne and Mei Lian! LOL.. Darn you all force me to sing! I can but shy lah - Don't mind me ok? LOL. No matter how much energy you put in to make me sing, it won't work! Anyway, darn it was pexpensive - have to pay 21 bucks for the snacks and 2 lemon teas! Should have sang man but shouldn't regret it since its already over! Well, took some photos just now - If you want to view, please click on this link KTV FUN and then click on the photo album 'KTV fun'. Tried posting the pics here but darn! there was a link error! Pui! Haha!



THE PAOMNNEHAL PWEOR OF THE HMUAN MNID



Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh?



-Courteousy of Yao Xiang-



Adios!

WAYS TO KILL YOUR BOREDOM ON A SUNDAY



I have to admit that Sunday is one of those boring days in the week. Damn, there are no good shows on t.v. and darn the weather - hot and humid. Sunday is supposedly to be a day when there are no school and no work and when they stay at home together with their families, trying to enjoy the Sunday but when they take the remotes and switched on the television, no good programmes. It sucks! Hey, please! When people are schooling and working on weekdays, they are bound to air good shows on t.v. Bleah!



Anyway, if you are really feeling bored, really darn bored at home, here's some tips.



1) Go out with your family for lunch for dinner or whatever, at least its better than staying at home to rot right?



2) Go out with your boyfriends/girlfriends. Spend some time with them. Bring them somewhere romantic. No! not to places that makes u perspire! That's so not romantic. Bring them to watch movies instead, ice-skating on a hot and humid day would be preferably nice.



3) Instead of staying at home and playing your X-BOX, playstation or P.C games, go out to town, to the arcade and game there. Waste some money. Its for your own use. Why keep it instead! Duh!



4) Study on a Sunday? Okay - maybe for those who loves to study.. Go out to the library to study instead of coping yourself at home... Try the National Library. After studying over there, you can have your lunch or dinner at town!



5) Go KTV and sing your hearts out ... that is what I will be doing today...



Adios!



Happy-O-Meter: 2.5/5

Level Of Happiness: 50%

FAIRYTALE LOVE



Real love only exist in fairytales. In every story, they will have a happy ending. Take Cinderella for example. She was tortured by her stepmother and stepsisters, being ordered around but in the end, her fairy godmother transformed Cinderella into a beautiful priness and then met up with the prince. Both of them fall in love and then got married. It was a happy ending. But in real life, this rarely happens. In those fairytale stories, they didnt potray themselves having conflicts, having problems in their relationships and poof, suddenly they got married within the shortest days after knowing each other. How ridiculous could that be? - Very. In every relationship there are bound to be conflicts between both parties. They are bound to quarrel with one another. If you asked someone and if he/she says they are having a great relationship without any quarrels or conflicts, let me tell you this - bullshit, just plain bullshit! Come on, tell me which of you have a relationship and you had never quarrel with your boyfriends/girlfriends before? *winks* Am I right?



CONFUSED



I am feeling so terrible inside, etched in the darknesss of time despair..lost in the depth of sorrowful hope...an everlasting pain embeded within. I went to meet up with my EX. Part of me felt so nervous, part of me felt so disappointed, part of me still loves you. I was feeling rather confused, lost in my own world. I was afraid I will break into tears upon seeing you. :( I took up the courage and finally aprroached you where you waited for me - Tanjong Pagar Block 4, near the market. I said 'Hi' and you replied the same to me. After that, it was silence. I knew deep inside me, I wanted to have a conversation with you. There were so many things to ask and tell. We walked the stairs to the third floor, to the study corner where you had left your bag there. We sat down and I finally had the courage to smile at you. I took the CDs from my bag and gave to you back. And there was silence yet again. It was just for a few seconds, but to me, its like forever. And then you asked 'give me your hand'. I said ' Why?' Seconds later, you took out a pouch from the bag and handed it to me. I knew what was inside - the other half of the pair of heart and the ring that I had given to you. I told you, 'keep it if not throw it away.' - But I didn't mean what I've said. I was plain sad that you are giving me back those things and disappointed that you do not want to keep them with you. And then you broke into tears. You lean your head on my shoulder. My expression - shocked. Why? Because you suddenly cried. Sad. Why? Because I saw you cry and that makes me guilty. Why guilty? - I don't know. I placed my hands on your face and asked why you broke into tears... You didn't reply. I told you to look up into my eyes but you dare not to. And then I patted your back, 'everything will be fine. Don't cry...please...' You look up and gazed into my eyes. Your eyes were red... 'Don't cry' And then I hugged you as tight as I could. I really don't wish to let you go but... I have to. Someone else has liked you, you were taken and I don't think we can be together... 'Can I kiss you?' You nodded your head, and I planted a kiss on your lips which led to a passionate one. I wished it would last forever but it didn't... 'I have to go now...take care of yourself...study hard. If you ever have problem, call me...I will always be there for you.' I planted the last kiss to your lips and then left without looking back, in fear that I would cry...



Happy-O-Meter: 1.4/5

Level Of Happiness: 23%

I had set my alarm to 4.30a.m. intending to revise my school test for a while but didn't manage to wake up in time. I did hear the alarm setting off but I wasn't bothered to get out of my bed. Eventually, I fell asleep again and woke up at 5.45a.m. Took my shower, drank some plain water and now logged on the the internet to write Michelle's friendsters' testimonial and I will be logging off from the net after writing this blogger of mine. Oh, I am having Digital Application test Chapter 1 -6. Good luck to myself!

Life's ups and downs provide windows of opportunity to determine your values and goals. Think of using all obstacles as stepping stone to build the life you want.



Happy-O-Meter: 3.9/5

Level Of Happiness: 69%

Life is full of unpredictable turns, unpredictable answers and unpredictable moves. You won't know what to expect next just like you can never know when the next storm will come, when will we be hit with sickness, poverty and so on. We cant for sure determine what our future will be like. Changes may takes place somewhere, somehow along the way. I feel really dismayed with my love life. I feel so shattered, so disappointed. I thought that was it - i found my true love. I found THE ONE but the ending didn't turn out that way. We broke up a month ago...and i waited and waited but in the end, it's all over just in a split second. I was faithful and patient but I lose everything. When I'm writing this blogger of mine, I tired to hold my back my tears. I am feeling so depressed, so down.



{flashbacks}

Though we have only been friends for a day and attached on the following day, I still believe our relationship will work and there is chemistry bewteen us. It was you whom had ask me to be your boyfriend. I accepted you without hesitation.It was 1.51a.m. and its still so vivid in my mind. We went out together the next day after we got attached and all I have to say was that you are much more gorgeous looking in person. You have the x factor, really appealing to me. I remembered we took a transIsland bus to Suntec City, I was so damn shy, I didn't even dare to hold your hand, let alone say the "I Love you' word to you but in the end, I did. I whispered to your ears, those sweet tender words. And then we went to esplanade, we sat at the stairways.You were sweating, and i swept away your perspiration while yet again whispered the "I love you' to your ear. As days past, our love grew stronger, so strong that no one could break us apart.And then came our first month anniversary. I didn't really buy you any present but I was hoping you would be happy when you were out with me. I planned everything. Yup, and I would always sent you home. On the 2nd February, we had a slight misunderstanding but everything soon was resolved. I had always kept a diary with me, noting down the places we went and the things we do together. On Valentines' Day, I had it all planned. We went to Ikea first. Why did i bring you there? - Its because I wanted to show you that we have a future and then I want to build a home with you.And then we went to Paragon Mall, and that was when I gave you the first gift (8 colorful gems) representing the colors of life.Final we went to the war memorial and there I suprised you with a ring that I had bought with my pocket money. I was honoured to slip the ring into your hand :p and I will not forget that very moments. We went to bugis village to take our dinner, and i had my first taste of beer. I was drunk but you did not left me alone at the streets. You hailed a cab and brought me home. I still remembered you sent me to the third floor and I told you that I would be okay. I felt so touched. On our 2nd anniversary, I bought you a 2-pair heart that you had always fancied. I knew you like it so much and that's why I decided to buy it. But from that point onwards, we began to quarrel so intensely each and every day. It really hurts me and you. And finally on 20th March, we broke up. I was heart-broken, crying each and every night. Each day, I called you, I sms you, seeking for forgiveness, thinking that you forgive me...but you didnt...as days past by, i tried again but this time, you began to cool down abit. I asked for a patch back but you were relectant. For a month, I've been suffering, so were you. I waited for you, I waited for you to accept me back but to no avail. I wasn't having fun for the past one month. I was so depressed, I had no will to go to school and study. I was lost in my own world. But each time you text a message to me, I thought there was still a glimpse of hope left for me...but...it didn't happen. Even though I have been going out with my classmates, its only to de-stress myself. And I have been faithful. I have not been seeing anybody..I wasn't till the very last minute.

{flashbacks}{end}



Anyway, I don't want this to affect my happiness so haiz, let's talk about yesterday.



During TKS Lessons

I was having my group discussion on the project we had to do. Eh..the teacher went round to ensure that everyone was doing their part. Our group was a little slacking and teacher asked us to fasten our pace. And suprisingly, he thought that I was the group leader but I was not! Anway he told me in his own presice words.



"You must be the group leader. You look intelligent. I hope you can assist your other team members."



I was like what? and WOW! haha.



After class

I watched "Into the Mirror" with Erna, Su`aad and Salimie. One hell of a scary show. I was practically screaming at some of the horror scenes. Then afterwards, we went to Erna's house. Waited for the damn bus no. 70 for quite a while when suddenly I felt so agitated, 'where's the bus!' So, I decided to take a cab. :p Then we went fishing, Didn't catch any fish but in the end a kind hearted uncle gave away three of his fishes that he had caught :p



*Yawns* Finish my Customer Service homework @ 1.56a.m.



Happy-O-Meter: 2.5/5

Level Of Happiness: 50%

Good Morning to Everyone! Good Morning to myself! Today is a brand new day and a whole brand new week. We'll talk more about life once i get back from school ya? OH, I just log in to mydreamd8.com and I read Janice's pleas to stay on in the contest. She've written well to mesmerize me, I bet the others will be too! I hope Janice could win this competition! Endure this hardship that you have to face! Good Luck and two thumbs up!



Happy-O-Meter: 3.6/5

Level Of Happiness: 68%

Well, people walking on the streets will eventually sees me as an arrogant brat who knows everything and tries to act cool but if you know me well, I'm not that kind of person. Eventually, I'm pretty easy-going and sociable. Let's take for example when I first entered Secondary School, on my first day, I was so quiet and I had put on a stern face. LOL. In actual fact, I was shy and reserved about myself. Nobody dared to approach me but suprising enough, my form teacher, Mr. Leong had chose me as the class chairman.. What the.. LOL. I tried to relax alittle and slowly ventured into making new friends but nah! I couldn't even open my darn mouth and say a simple 'hello'. I tried to smile and yeah! - it worked. As time ticked by, i had quite a number of friends by the end of the day.. :P

I would have to say when you are a leader or the boss or the manager or someone who is from the higher management or has the power to conquer, you tend to be snobbish, arrogant, in control, and tends to order people around. Well, let me tell you, you will lose your friends in a rate of a speeding bullet. Nobody will dare to get close to you... I've been there, done that - so I know. Been in control for quite sometimes and i tend to order and instruct people around. My classmates disliked me for what I've done. But as I entered my Secondary 3 life, everything started to change. Though I am still in control, but I've learn to be a better leader. From then onwards, their mindsets on me started to change. two thumbs up! I was elected to be the president for my Aesthetics Club; for those of you who are wondering what that club is all about... its about arts , drawings! LoL, just noticed that I've been degrading myself in my blogspot! But no that's not true... I just want you all to know that there's also a bad side of me. Afterall, you all always see my good side but not the bad ya? *winks*

My characters(+): Friendly, socialble, caring, understanding, sincere, faithful, loving, romantic etc.

(-): Sometimes lazy, revengeful!



I've been watching Dawn of the Dead's trailer repeatedly! Its great! I've just downloaded the movie from Tommy @ IRC. Didn't really watch fully, skipped a few interesting parts.. because i'm still wanting to watch the movie in the cinema! Haiz, getting listless now! Going to bed and have my good rest!



Happy-O-Meter: 3.4/5

Level Of Happiness: 64%

Well, the viruses that are infecting the p.cs nowadays are getting more advanced... I;ve been affected by a virus yesterday but unsure what it was. My laptop automatically shut down and by the time i tried to switch it on this morning, i wasn't even able to get to the deskop, have to reformat... Darn!

And then yet again was infected by the 32.Welchia.worm virus. I had to search for the patch but my system was shut down four times even before i could finish downloading the patch... Lucky me, Tommy was able to help me!

All I have to say to the person who has created that welchia worm virus -- damn it, go get a life of your own and stop infesting viruses to our comp! You low-lying creep! Sore loser!

Everyone has a fear of their own - fear of heights, claustrophobia, fear of seeing gruesome events or stuffs, fear of insects or bugs, fear of failing, and many more. Eventually, I have a fear - and that is fear of failing; in life. There's a saying; 'At one point of your life, you are bound to tumble down and fail, and you will feel helpless, unsure of what to do and what to expect next. But if you do tumble from the highest peak of your life, don't feel despair, get up and start afresh, start all over again. Get back up to your feet. Yeah, its pretty easy when you say instead of doing it. There was one point of my life; that was when i was 17 years old, my world came tumbling down, shattered and destroyed.

{flashbacks} I was in Secondary 5(Normal Academics). It was the first day of school, i thought I could cope with my studies but... Everything went well for the first two weeks but as days pass by, the topics became tougher, epecially for math. I began to skip math lessons every now and then. Began to drift away from my studies; my heart and soul weren't there anymore. But I couldn't keep on skipping classes and unfortunately one fine day, my form teacher took noticed of the days which i hadn't come to school and that's only when there's math lesson on that day. I tried to attend each and every math lessons, and finally I really did. The math teacher gave motivational talk to me; she inspired me to work hard and I did. In Mid-May, we had do to our final project for design and technology. The theme was moving objects. I did a crumb collector. I wasn't that keen in making one but I did with the help from my workshop's teachers. It has been tough for me for the first half of that year. After June school break, I thought everything will be much easier for me...but no. Pressure pressure and more pressure. I was choked with homeworks, tests and exams. I was going to break down but being strong-willed, I tried to suppress my emotions. My final year exam as approaching - it was in November. Before that, we had our prom night! Even before the prom night, something happened. One controversy. My best friend didn't really betrayed me but they ditched me when I'm already useless to them. My best friend, A, scheme a cunning end for his nemesis, K. I was in cahoots with him together with our the other best friend, L. We slowly tortured K emotionally and mentally but not physically each day. Till to a point when I accidentally left a trace behind. A, my best friend cum the mastermind, couldn't do anything. I was trapped. I had nowhere to run. And then, my good reputation was tarnished. One by one of my classmates began to turn away from me. ONly a few left stood by me. It was terrible, it was one of my lowest point of my life and my GCE 'O' Level examinations was around the corner. Pressurized by studies. I didn't perform well for my 'O's especially when I was doing my math's papers. Darn, I couldn''t even think right, let alone focus. Three months passed and it was time for me to collect my GCE 'O' Level results slip. I was anxious and hoping I would pass my math. As I approached my form teacher, I had the confidence, - maybe i did pass my math. But my confidence was shattered into a million pieces. I failed - F9! No more poly for me! - That was my first thought that came across my mind. I looked at my best friend, A,; he was rejoicing over his success while as for me I was totally crushed. I didn't approach them, instead I exit myself from the other route and went to my void deck. I look at the result slips and finally, I broke down, I cried. {flashbacks}

But now, all of the past is now memories to me. I ain't sure why but I am still friends with my best friend. They always thought I was a quiet, soft-hearted who can be stepped on, those kind and caring person who is willing to do anything and whatever they want me to. But no way, they don't know what I am capable of yet. I can be scheming, cunning, two-face kind of guy. It's just that I don't show them out of me. It's not really me. But if they do push my 'anger' button, then a controversy will start. Now, it seems to me that my classmates are okay with me now since they had added me to their friendster's friends list. :p



Happy-O-Meter: 3.1/5

Level Of Happiness: 58%

I kept on watching 'Dawn Of The Dead' trailer. The trailer itself is already so scary. Somehow, there's something msytical about this movie - the settings, the story plot, and especially the main actress. I can't wait to watch the show in the cinema! Oh, and i am going to remember myself to do my homework by listing all the homeworks that I have to do by tomorrow in my blogger.



1. Digital Application Tutorial 7.1

2. Customer Service (Bad/Good Experience+Learning Points)



Happy-O-Meter: 3/5

Level Of Happiness: 57%

The sun has rise, the day has began - a new day to be exact. It has been one hell of a tiring week - not enough rest, felt so lethargic, coping with homeworks and tests. But finally, the weekends has come - Phew! It is blazing hot now and I feel so warm and sticky. Just woke up to be exact. Though it has been tiring week, my friends are there to always lift up the atmostphere. Hmm got to take my shower! Will continue to blog later!



Happy-O-Meter: 2.7/5

Level Of Happiness: 54%

Hmm...my mind is blank. Not sure what to type... Erm.. ah... oh... :P



Happy-O-Meter: 2.6/5

Level Of Happiness: 50%

One of the funniest thing that had happened today was when my class advisor asked everyone to reply him back with the labs we were at. And I was on the phone, asking about Chow Weng's and his gangs' whereabouts. Nurulhuda replied Mr. Shafique "Lab 21!" whereas there are only until lab 8. Haha! What a joke. She repeated the same thing when he asked her again...Today went to East Coast Park, saw Chow Weng...we mingled with him for awhile and we headed home at 6.



Happy-O-Meter: 2.8/5

Level Of Happiness: 53%

Meaningful Phrases:



Never be afraid to fall in love. It may hurt a lot, it may give you aches and pain, but if you don't follow your heart; in the end you will cry even more for not giving love a chance.



If someone loves you, love them back not only because they love you, but also becasue they are teaching you to love and opening your heart and eyes to things you have never seen or felt without them.



The past is meant to be used as a tool for the future. Bad experiences indeed make you bitter but the lessons learned should make you better.



Someday, someone might come into your life and love you in a way you always wanted. If your someday was yesterday, LEARN; if your someday is tomorrow, HOPE; if your someday is today, CHERISH. **what if that someday never comes... sigh~**



Let go of the hand of the person you love, but don't let go of God's hand. For when you hold on to His hand, He may be holding the person you love on the other hand, to let you hold each other again. **will God let me hold his hand even if He noes he's not right for me even tho i love him?**



Don't be surprised if one day I'll avoid you and be gone,

it's not because you've done something wrong..

but because I'm afraid to love and be hurt again

by somebody who can't love me in return..



sigh, how true. i feel like i can't love anyone ever again cos it hurts so much when the person u love doesn't love u back. it hurts even more so when the person u love TELLS u that he/she wont love u back. does that mean that when one is afraid to get hurt, one will not love? urgh. i shall jus be mean to everyone and not be nice. then i will not love and i will not get hurt.



Happy-O-Meter: 3.2/5

Level Of Happiness: 61%

It's been three days since I last write my bloggers. Was busy and sometimes was too tired to write. Well, let's see...12th April Monday was the fav day of mine. I went to Erlina's house together with Devi, Sua`ad, and Salimie. We ate chicken rice! Yummy~. After that, we proceeded to Punggol Park for... FISHING! We bought another fishing net as to speed up the process of getting more fishes within those hours. Time ticked by, and yet we hadn't got any fishes. But miriculously towards the ending, me and Sua`ad went to the other site of the fishing spot and wha lah! We caught a dozen fishes, mostly Luo Han and 1 catfish. It was the biggest achievements I and Sua'ad had made so far. Yeah, but when I reached home, 5 of the fishes died as they had lack of oxygen.

That's enough for monday. Let's talk about today. There was no Sports and Wellness - Woke up at 9... By the time, I left my house, it was already 9.20a.m. and I had missed my bus. Haiz~ Have to take the cab to school instead. I arrived school quite early, couldn't find any of our classmates - I waited. As time ticked, one by one of them arrived. Practically, during Digital Application lesson, I didn't really pay attention as I was pretty much tired and sleepy. After class had ended, we went to Singapore Post, KFC to have our lunch there. 2.40p.m. - here I am typing my blogger in Internet Application class.



Happy-O-Meter: 3.6/5

Level of Happiness: 68%

Yet again, I had no time to write my bloggers yesterday..Anway, today I had to do my CIP, flag day. I had to meet the rest at the meeting point, Hong Leong Finance: City PLaza, at 8 sharp but was a little late and thought i would get lectured but no, there were others who came later than me. Phew! A sigh of relieve. I had to queue up to get my donation tin and stickers. Minutes later, I started off the journey with my classmates. But before that, we went to MacDonalds at Lion City for breakfast. While my classmates were eating inside the fast food restaurant, I was outside busy collecting and asking for donations :P Hardworking? Neh, I was just doing my job! After the whole event had ended, I gave back my tin and sticker to the officer-in-charge. They graded me fair for the job well done while most of my classmates were graded poor as their tins were filled only with a mere 10cents coin or 20cents coin. I had my lunch at Arnold fast food restaurant with Salimie, Erna and Sua`ad. I guessed we were really famished; we ordered a whole spring chicken and gobbled it down within minutes! LOL. Then we headed to Marina Square for a game of bowling. I scored 118! Topping the others. We had planned what to do and where to go next - and that was to head down to Erna's house but it was cancelled at the very last minute. I had to go back but...considering the time that it was still too early, I accompanied Sua`ad home and then went to Bedok. I took bus number 14 and went down to meet Elson a.ka Eddie at orchard mrt control station. He was late! Anyway, its okay with me. We were queueing up at the ticketing booth. Minutes later and it was our turn to purchase the tickets. Elson went to the gents so I was left alone, purchasing the tickets. I don't know what the heck happened but my mind went blank. I asked for the 7.30 show but I couldn't recall what movie was I going to watch. I went 'Erm, I wanna watch... eh... what's the movie called? Erm...Let me think." 30 seconds had passed. I began to panicked but wha lah! Lucky me, the name of the movie just zoomed in my mind again. "Taking Lives!" LOL. We went to watch The movie was less that 2 hours. Superb! 4/5. It has been months ever since I watched a really good movie! Thumbs up! And then we sat outside Takashimaya shopping center. Minutes later, we decided to go home! And here I am, writing my blogger for today! Ciao



Happy-O-Meter: 3.5/5

Level Of Happiness: 52%

I woke up late and had to rush for school. Took bus 63 5 mins past 8. I knew that I was going to be late. I had to made a decision on whether to alight and take a cab or continue to take the bus and be late for class. A choice had been made and I chose to alight at the bus-stop near Outram Mrt Station and went to hail a cab. Lucky for me, I reach there just a minute late...Practically, I wasn't talking much in class today. I kept quiet and was sealed in my own world, hardly speaking to anyone. Even if I do, I would only reply them a sentence or two. I was feeling rather moody, feeling rather down. And...I would have to end my blog here as I am completely clueless of what to write and that I am still feeling moody...



Happy-O-Meter: 1/5

Level Of Happiness: 30%

Today, I didn't attend Sports and Wellness lesson, so I kinda miss doing the exercises... I came to school at 10a.m. sharp. As I was on my way to school, in bus, I was very distorted in my mind - lost and confused. Practically, I wasn't myself. Upon reaching the school, upon entering the gate, I took one thorough look at the entire school from the buildings to the hall to the facilities to the teachers to my friends, classmates and buddies. Then, sadness clouded my vision. I tried to supress the sadness that I'm feeling.

I didn't talk much in school today.Anway, I had a short Digital Application quiz that consists of 30 marks. We had to finish it up within twenty minutes. I don't think I did well for it as I had forgotten that there was a quiz today and I was not in the state of mind to do my test - I was not concentrating on it at all. I'm not sure whether I will pass the test or will I flung it badly... Before the test, the teacher asked why I didnt attend the lesson before her's. I told her I went to Nanyang Polytechnic for administration stuffs. And in between her speeches, I didn't know Algenand, my classmate was talking to me, and I practically ignored him. And I didnt know that Carol was trying to take the initiative to talk to me but I didnt pay enough attention to notice her. I was afraid she was still mad at me for casting her away for the Digital Application pairing up work. The lesson then ended and we had a two long hours break before the next lesson starts. By that time, I wasn't feeling too well. Sick? - No. Urgent matters to be settled? - No. Just want to go home and have a good rest...I didn't attend the Internet Application lesson. Oh and what the heck, I was told by my classmates that they had an early dismissal. Should have gone for it instead of going home. Upon reaching home, I logged on to MSN, checked my friendster for a while and then took a quick shower before I tugged in to bed and have a good rest...



Happy-O-Meter: 2.5/5

Level Of Happiness: 43%

Well, I didnt have the time to write my bloogers yesterday... So I shall compensate it today. I started off the day feelng moody - not pretty sure why though. I was feeling a little arrogant too. Anyway, upon entering my class, the whole atmosphere changed. I was jovial and perky. Ah! The Internet Application Lab 2 - I was practically grasping for helped but to nobody could solve my problem. Time ticked harshly and I was getting desperate of getting help. And then... Erlina came along! Walah! With a snap of her finger, everything was solved and in place. I was grateful to her. By twelve, I was already out of school, going to Erlina's house with Sua'ad and Taufik. Wondering what food will Erlina's mum will be cooking for us! Upon reacing her home, i settled down and then started playing with her playstation. My first pripority was to get to the fighter club stage in the flight game at the playstation..Yes, after some time, I managed to complete the stage! Hooray, was feelig proud of myself. I was getting famished but soon after, the food were ready. We were having SPAGHETTI! - It was delicious! 5/5! In between the hours, it was pouring heavily. We waited for an hour or so for our fishing activity to begin. I was really happy and proud of what we had caught today - prawns, small dozens of fishes, a gold fish and a Luohan fish. Hip Hip Hooray! Erlina was the one who mostly did the catching of fishes. (Laughing Out Loud)... It was getting dark and we had to end the fishing activity. We, yet again, had dinner at Erlina's house..SPAGHETTI!.. It was still ever so delicious! Hours later, I reached home and watched Smallville. And here I'm sitting at the balcony ending the day by writing my blogger. Ciao!



Happy-O-Meter: 4/5

Level Of Happiness: 78%

The Start

It's been quite long ever since I write on blogspots. Here I am again, writing...telling you more about myself each day. It was initially a very hot and humid but it soon became dark and windy. Time ticked and raindrops began falling down from skies above. I was at my balcony, surfing tru` the net, hoping to come across some good websites. It's pretty cold and I'm still lost in my dreamland. There's practically nothing much to do on a Sunday...I spend most of my time glued to my laptop..but most probably at nite if I am not tired, I will be revising my schoolwork.

I still love you alot, really really alot...and I still haven't gotten over you.. I will always be waiting and waiting till one day we will be together again...

Happy-O-Meter: 3.9/5
Level Of Happiness: 63%